Life is fragile

A few weeks ago, my Mum was waiting for me when she was seized by a sudden chest pain. She sat down, took slow and deep breaths, and felt better. She told me all about it when I arrived to find her seated at Burger King's looking a little spaced out. At that, I felt a little sick with fear. This was not the first time chest pains struck my Mum like a bolt from the blue. The first time it happened was about 7 years ago, while we were holidaying in Bangkok. The second time it happened was last year. When it happened the second time, the pain was so bad my Mum went to a nearby clinic to have a check-up done. The doctors didn't find anything wrong. There wasn't anything they could do about it, either. My Mum has thus been lucky so far in avoiding what appeared to be a stroke or heart attack but who knows about the next time?

I've seen and personally experienced how life can take a drastic turn after a stroke happens. My Granny used to be really sporty; she was a badminton champion and woke up early every morning to do tai chi. She ate healthily too. This was someone who was in the pink of health. One day, she suffered a stroke and had to be hospitalized. Now she's bedridden, goes around in a wheelchair and as if things weren't bad enough already, also suffers from severe dementia. When I come to visit, I often find myself staring at her for long. She lies in bed quietly, sometimes sleeping, sometimes staring into space. Her hair, which was once curly, is now straight after years without going for a perm. But what I notice most is her eyes. They once had a gleam to them, a gleam that reflected her zest for life. Now they are glassy, and when they see me or the others, there is no spark of recognition. I find it hard to recognize her as the Granny of my childhood, the one who made excellent cupcakes and bean dumplings, brought me lunches for school in tiffin carriers and occasionally dropped by at my home to see how we're doing. The little old lady in bed today is and isn't my Granny. It didn't make any sense to me at all why she is in her current condition, when she had lived rather healthily. Perhaps it's something to do with genes. Whatever it is, it's downright unfair that this should happen to her.

What happened to my Granny drove home the point that life is fragile. That things happen, and the life you know can crumble like a house of cards. I admire my Mum's strength in dealing with my Granny's condition. It must have been very hard on her to see my Granny so frail and unable to recognize even her own daughter. Yet I have never once seen my Mum cry over my Granny, or if she did, she took great care to hide her tears from us. Then a few weeks ago, my Mum experienced chest pains, a red flag for stroke or heart attack. It's quite unlikely she would be struck by one at her age, and I sincerely hope she is spared from such pain. Yet should one actually happen, I wouldn't know what to do. Of course I would care for her. But how do I deal with the drastic change the stroke brings? Or the shock and pain? Do I have my Mum's strength to do so? Imagining my Mum as a stroke patient is frightening, and while it does not seem possible for now, such a scenario is frightfully real. Anything can happen, sometimes extreme enough to change the life you once knew, and it can occur when you least expect it. Such is the fragility of life.

Life, happiness and a little randomness

Nice one there.

On a completely unrelated and random note, I successfully drew a helmut and a gun using some reference pics. It's a big deal all right, because all along I thought I was only capable of drawing people. Errr, the gun and helmut are part of this Gundam 00 fanart I'm working on, not some blueprint for world domination.

Ayanami, Shikinami, Makinami ... and Gundam 00 Season 2 ROCKS!

Finally, we now know the name of the new female EVA pilot to be introduced in the Evangelion 2.0 movie: Mari Illustrious Makinami. I got the info from the Evangelion 2.0 Wikipedia page, which cited the April 18 EVA-EXTRA01 magazine as the source of reference. As the release date for the movie (June 27 in Japan) draws nearer and nearer, more and more info is surfacing.

This is Mari as she appears in the trailer:

Brown hair and red specs. Gahh, I prefer anime characters without specs. Specs tend to geekify characters. Oh well, she still isn't bad -looking.

A figurine of Mari:

Guess how much this yet-to-be-released figurine costs? US$42.97!!! That's about 84 Singapore Dollars! Whoa, talk about daylight robbery! A figurine usually costs about 10 Singapore Dollars. This one's 8 times the usual price! Insanity, that.

Mari Illustrious Makinami, huh? Judging by the name, she's of mixed parentage, just like Asuka Langley Soryu. Oh wait, did I mention that Asuka's surname isn't Soryu but Shikinami in the movie? Uh-huh. Apparently, the name change was done to continue the Japanese maritime vessel naming convention (Soryu, on the other hand, is the name of an World War 2 aircraft carrier). Again, gahhhhhh. Asuka Langley Soryu has a much better ring to it than Asuka Langley Shikinami. Or maybe I'm just used to Soryu. A forummer at Anime News Network noted something interesting: the names of the 3 female EVA pilots, Ayanami, Shikinami and Makinami rhyme. Coincidence? Hmmm, we'll see when the movie hits the big screen. And it better screen in Singapore, because I'm highly anticipating it!

In other anime news, I've finished watching Gundam 00 Season 2!!! I'm telling y'all, it's GOOD. Better than Season 1 in my view. There's more action, new looks, really addictive music and some rather interesting character developments. Oh, and I must say, I totally love the Ptolemios 2 crew's new uniforms ! *steals the jacket* See here:

Like Evangelion, there's an upcoming movie for Gundam 00 too! I blogged about it the last time remember? The Gundam 00 movie is slated for release in 2010. Details on the movie are very sketchy as of now. All we know is that it's got something to do with Jupiter and "The Childhood of Humankind Ends". Hmmm. Whatever it is, the movie is apparently going to cover a whole lot, going by last month's Animage magazine's interview with a couple of production staff. This dude Kuroda likened the anime to being 'five-tenths to the base of Mt Fuji' (see an excerpt of the interview here) In other words, a long way to go, probably about half-way through. That's great to know because I was quite sorry when Season 2 ended. I enjoyed it so much, but at the same time felt that more aspects could have been developed further. Possibly in the movie? 2010 can't come soon enough!!! Domo arigato gozaimasu, Sunrise!!!

And this concludes today's Anime News with YY;)

Image credits:

www.animepaper.net

Google Images

www.hlj.com/product/BAN959039

Australia, here I come!

By now, nearly every Singaporean 'A' level graduate should have gotten at least one place in a university. Quite a lot of people I know are going to NUS (National University of Singapore), a handful have decided on NTU (Nanyang Technological University). I don't know anyone who has secured a place in SMU (Singapore Management University). As for me, I'm heading to the School of Political Sciences and International Studies, University of Queensland, Australia.

I should've announced this long ago,but just didn't get round to doing it. Oh well. Why abroad, you ask? Firstly, my 'A' level grades aren't good enough for the local universities. I mean, I have DECENT grades (an 'A', 2 'B's, a 'C' and a 'D'), but with the explotion in demand for places in the local universities, excellent grades aren't good enough, much less decent ones. Besides, none of the local universities offer my dream course. NTU has absolutely no International Relations course or anything related to that. SMU does have a Political Science course, but that course does not seem to cover much of International Relations, if at all. NUS's Political Science course is the closest to what I want; International Relations is a major component of the study of Political Science at NUS. Still, International Relations is but a SUBSET of Political Science in NUS. I want International Relations on its own. Lastly, I have the opportunity to go abroad. Why not take it? It's going to be a very interesting experience, striking out on my own in a foreign land.

Actually, Australia isn't my first choice. The country I really wanted to go to was the UK, unfortunately, all the UK universities I applied to rejected me. I blame it on that 'D' which sticks out like a sore thumb. After getting over the UK, I considered USA. USA degrees are very highly regarded, more so than Australia or even UK. Pity USA is very far from Singapore and the US dollar is stronger. Other countries I considered were Canada and Australia. The dilemma finally ended when I received an unconditional offer from the University of Queensland. Australia is close to Singapore, quite safe and the Australian Dollar is nearly on par with the Singapore dollar. So I accepted the offer and here I am today, almost prepared to go Down Under.

It' going to be so exciting studying abroad, but at the same time, I'm going to miss Singapore, my family, loved ones and friends. I spent 19 years of my life here on this island and as much as we Singaporeans like to complain about the gahmen, the bloody system and the sibeh hot climate, I think we have a sense of attachment to this country, deep down. I for one do. My flight to Australia (somewhere in mid-July) is drawing closer and I'm both anticipating and dreading it.

I am AWARE, hear me roar, in numbers too big to ignore

Old Guards: 1414
New Guards: 761

That's the results of the final showdown between the Old Guards and the New Exco yesterday at Suntec City. I wasn't among the 3000 who turned up at the Extraordinary General Meeting, but like the 3000 and many more Singaporeans, am concerned about the turn AWARE's future would take. Would it go back to being secular and tolerant like it was before being hijacked by Josie Lau and gang? Or would it go over to the dark-side of being pro-family (fundamenalist speak for being anti-gay, anti-abortion and anti-contraception) ? In the end, Singaporean women spoke out strongly against the New Exco and got them ousted.

I read the news reports on how the EGM went this morning and was struck by one thing: the fierce support displayed by the supporters of the Old Guard. Shouting down Thio Su Mien ( "It's very scary", Dr Thio later commented). Speaking up one after another in favour of the Old Guard when the floor was open to comments. The presence of celebrities like Irene Ang and well-known figures like Bridget Lew (president of HOME). So much for Singaporeans being apathetic lot concerned only with bread-and-butter issues. The AWARE afffair is a mix of issues like rights, secularism vs religion, feminism, homosexuality and most importantly, the need for a space for diversity. It's got nothing to do with the economy or jobs, yet Singaporeans (especially the women) have been extremely vocal and gung-ho about the entire affair. What started out as an internal dispute has somehow captured the hearts and minds of Singaporeans. For me, I initially dismissed it as an internal squabble gone awry. I still think this matter should never been blown up to its current proportions but I have also come to realize that it's so much more than some power struggle. Nor is it just about liberals and gays versus Christian fundamentalists. It's a fight for the sort of Singapore society we want: diverse, inclusive and where we can speak up and be heard.

Now that Singaporeans have demonstrated that they can and will fight for the Singaporean society, I wonder if the fight can be taken at a higher level: challenging the PAP's decades long grip on society and power.